Having sex for the first time can sometimes seem like a big deal, but it doesn’t have to be. Whether it’s your first time ever or with a new partner, you might be getting some nerves ahead of the moment itself. But don’t worry; we’ve got you covered. With our first-time sex tips, you can make sure you’re approaching sex in a healthy and safe way, both physically and mentally.
For some reason, our society places an unnecessary emphasis on ‘losing your virginity.’ Many traditional definitions of virginity rely on things like penis-in-vagina sex. However, such descriptions can be harmful and exclude a vast amount of people. They also fail to account for the many wonderful and varied ways that all kinds of people have sex.
Virginity is a concept constructed by society. And, having sex for the first time, whatever that means to you and your partner, doesn’t fundamentally alter you, despite what some people claim. There’s no pressure for you to ‘lose’ or ‘keep’ your virginity. What’s important is that you’re both physically and emotionally ready and that you both understand things like safer sex and consent.
So, if you’re feeling a little nervous about your first time, you could probably use some tips and advice, right? Luckily for you, we’ve got exactly that. Our first-time sex tips apply to everyone, whether you’re a total novice or you’re planning on getting intimate with a new partner.
The run-up to having sex with someone for the first time can be charged with all kinds of emotions. Yet it’s vital that you take some time to check-in with how you’re actually feeling. Perhaps most essential is that you’re emotionally ready for what’s ahead. You shouldn’t feel pressured or obligated to have sex, whether from your peers or your partner.
Second on our list of first-time sex tips is to make sure your partner is feeling equally as comfortable as you. Consent from both parties is essential, so take the time to make sure you’re both feeling ready and relaxed with what’s ahead. Remember, effective communication can make first-time sex so much better.
Again, our society often creates unrealistic expectations about what sex should be and mean. In reality, it’s a highly personal thing that should focus on the things that feel good for both partners. Establishing boundaries plays a significant part in this. What types of activities do you enjoy? Which are you willing to try? And what things are you totally not up for? Think about these points and discuss them with your partner beforehand. Depending on what you’re planning, you might want to check out our post on The Best Sex Positions for Amazing Sex with Condoms for some inspiration.
Perhaps one of the most important first-time sex tips we can offer is to plan ahead to make sure you’re safe. Ultimately, you want to take care of your own body, as well as your partner’s. You can do this by using the right protection, whether it’s condoms, dental dams, or other forms of protection. You also need to know the risks of STIs and unwanted pregnancy and take the necessary steps to avoid them.
It’s perfectly natural to be nervous the first time you have sex with someone. In all likelihood, your partner will have their own nerves. As such, it’s always a good idea to spend plenty of time finding out what feels good for both of you. Foreplay is about getting each other feeling blissful and ready for whatever else you have in store. Again, communication is key here. Let your partner know if what they’re doing feels amazing, and ask them what really turns them on.
If any kind of penetrative sex is likely, make sure that you’ve got some good lubehandy. Although your bodies will often produce their own lubrication, a little extra is never a bad thing (it’s usually a very good thing). It can help reduce friction, increase smoothness, and means all-around better sex for everyone involved.
Last on our list of first-time sex tips is one of the most essential – make sure to enjoy it. Sex should be a positive, enjoyable, and fun experience. Don’t rush or put pressure on yourself or your partner. Instead, take the time to immerse yourself in the many incredible feelings and the closeness it can bring.